Monthly Archives: January 2014

How to prepare for a job interview

1. Show up in the wrong clothing

If you want to guarantee that you won’t be hired, make sure to show up dressed unprofessionally, since first impressions really are everything. Those impossible-to-walk-in six-inch stilettos may be a good option. Have lots of tattoos? Make sure to show them by wearing a sleeveless shirt. Just dyed your hair a funky color? Do NOT touch up the roots. These are surefire ways to have your prospective employer hoping the interview will end early.

2. Show up unprepared

If you made it past the first impression, a good way to ensure you won’t make it to the question part of the interview is to show up unprepared. That hard copy of your resume they asked you for? Your cat ate it or your printer was busted that day. That pen you need to take notes? Make sure it’s running out of ink, so they can see you struggling to scratch your notes like hieroglyphics onto the paper. The addresses of your past employees and email addresses of your references? Say they all moved or got fired, and you haven’t heard from them in years.

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